I often receive messages from people telling me they are concerned they might be a narcissist. I’d like to respond to anyone asking themselves this question by saying most likely you are NOT. At least, you’re not the kind of narcissist I try to warn others about through my books and on-line forum.
We’re all narcissistic to a certain degree. It is part of the human condition. Narcissism falls on a spectrum. Narcissism becomes dangerous and sick when one's behavior is what we call malignant. A malignant narcissist has no ability to be introspective and would never look at their own behavior to evaluate themselves honestly, which is why anyone who asks if they are narcissistic, most likely is not. If you were, you would never ask yourself this question or look inward to honestly assess yourself in the first place.
It is important to understand that malignant narcissists spend ALL of their time creating and manufacturing a false reality that supports their grandiose view of themselves. They lie to themselves every day in order to preserve a false perception of how much they are loved and adored. Anyone who challenges this false reality will be punished. Trump and several of his staff members continue to insist he drew the largest in-person crowd for an inauguration when every factual piece of evidence (i.e. aerial photos and Metro ridership) disputes it.
Many psychologists are now coming to the forefront breaking the Goldwater Rule (to not diagnose unless personally treated) to warn Americans of Donald Trump’s malignant narcissism. Psychologists do not need to personally treat him to have an opinion on what kind of narcissist he is because the facts speak for themselves.
When asked about his speech before the CIA, Trump stated: “That speech was a home run. That speech, if you look at Fox….they said it was one of the great speeches….in fact, they said it was the biggest standing ovation since Peyton Manning has won the SuperBowl.”
If we consider the size of the room in which the CIA met and the size of a football stadium, we know this is not physically possible by any stretch of the imagination. This is what psychologists mean when they say our President is delusional. He literally believes his own lies and will bend reality to ensure the image he projects of being adored and loved by all is maintained.
This is what concerns me most about Trump….how he spends his time. The President of the United States should not be up in the middle of the night tweeting to Meryl Streep or doctoring pictures of an inauguration crowd. His obsession with himself and his ego is putting us all in danger.
It is one thing when a narcissist’s fragile ego causes him to lie to himself, but quite another when he expects us to believe his lies in spite of blatant evidence to the contrary. Trump only surrounds himself with staff who will lie for him – Press Secretary Sean Spicer. Those who do not lie for him will be fired – former acting Attorney General Sally Yates. Those who report factual news that does not support his grandiose image of himself will be punished – The Press.
Trump cannot handle the truth about himself, and as a result, is putting America in a dangerous position. We need a President who will 'protect and defend,' not one who will 'project and lie' in order to be well-liked and adored at our very own expense. This is not a reality show. This is real life. I hope Trump will begin to realize the incredible responsibility he has been given and start getting honest with himself and the American people.